Saturday, June 19, 2010

I FEEL FAT TODAY!!!
Yes, it's one of those days. I am so tired of not eating anything & not losing any weight. It's partly because of the medicine I take, but, I'M HUNGRY! Can't the "skinny fairy" visit me after I'm asleep & just sprinkle some "skinny glitter" on me so I can wake up nice & trim? It doesn't help that I'm living with an old man (Harv), who eats anything & everything, ie, lots of ice cream & chocolate, & never gains an ounce...I gain just by watching him eat. Maybe the "fat fairy" could visit him & sprinkle....... oh Hell..... DUMP A BUCKET, of fat crap on him. Perhaps then, life would be fair!
Meanwhile, in my quest in life to inflict harm on myself....You, know?.....falling into walls whilst just standing in the middle of the room, tripping in front of Safeway & leaving my DNA all over their entrance..on a Saturday, in front of every customer they have? Or how about just walking into my bedroom & slipping, & suddenly I'm lying on the floor? Slipping off my shoes in the rain, on Elizabeth's back porch?............the list goes on. Anyway, on this journey of self-inflicted pain, I was cleaning my sewing room, seriously, I really was, putting patterns away, when I jammed a sliver down my fingernail...Now that hurt! Like the wimp I am, I screamed like a little girl, and ran to my Dr. to get it out. Well, no luck...she couldn't remove it. So now I have to wait for it to grow out..whatever that means.....could take up to 2 weeks...that's what Dr. said. So, for now, I'm trying to be brave, & suck it up. I can't, for the life of me, remember what, exactly, child birth felt like, but I'm sure it couldn't been as bad as this....otherwise, why would I have done it 5 times...No, I'm pretty sure it didn't hurt like this. I couldn't be that crazy, could I? Well, back to feeling fat.

1 comment:

Stacey Dean said...

as always you crack me up! Love you!